Wednesday, April 15, 2020
Boss Gets Drunk at Work Events
Boss Gets Drunk at Work Events Q: My manager drinks too much at work events and makes me uncomfortable. What can I do? I work at a university, and our department will have events every few months with an open bar (wine and beer only). My supervisor likes to take advantage of these and will get drunk basically every time. This manifests mainly as getting a little overly familiar (draping an arm around people) and sometimes being loud/voluble. I am often staffing these events, while he is there in more of a networking capacity, but Iâm worried it reflects poorly on our office. I know heâs also made other staff uncomfortable, though to my knowledge he hasnât crossed any major lines. As far as I know, he doesnât have a drinking problem and I donât think this indicates alcoholism, just that he needs to cut back at our events. Heâs my direct supervisor so Iâm not comfortable speaking up even though we have a solid relationship. Should I go to someone else who is on his level or go to his supervisor? Any advice on how to phrase that? Read More: Is it rude to respond to emails with just âokâ? A: Pick someone who you trust to handle it well (including seeing that thereâs a problem that needs to be addressed) and keep your name out of it. If you have multiple people who fit that bill and one of them is his manager, pick the manager â" but often thereâs only one person who meets those first two requirements, and thatâs the person you want. Iâd say this: âFergus has been regularly drinking a lot at department events and ends up getting pretty loud and overly familiar with people, doing things like putting his arm around them. I donât think heâs crossed any major lines, but itâs made some people uncomfortable, including me, and I hoped there might be a way for someone to have a word with him about it.â Iâd also make it clear that youâre talking with them on background only, meaning that you donât want your name attached to the information because you donât want tension in your relationship with him. (Iâm not always a fan of âIâm giving you this info but you canât say where you heard it,â but in this case itâs something that theyâll be able to verify firsthand and address that way. And when you have people feeling uncomfortable because their boss gets touchy-feely with them when drunk, the bigger priority is making someone aware of it.) I also want to note: I suspect some people will read this and think that a drunk colleague draping his arm over people in no big deal. And in some office cultures, it might not be. In your case, though, heâs making people who work for him uncomfortable, and so itâs worth raising. Read More: How can I recover from being embarrassingly drunk at a work event? Q: My boss ignores my emails if they donât require a response I work for a small, family-owned business. There are a number of issues, but what bothers me the most is that my boss â" the co-owner of the company â" ignores my emails. These emails donât require a response (most of them notify her that I will be working from home, am out sick, etc.) but I feel that itâs unprofessional and downright rude. While a response is not necessary, an acknowledgment would be nice. I feel ignored and disrespected. Should I say something? Read More: Do employers really look down on drinking and partying? A: No! Email that donât require a response ⦠donât require a response, by definition. Itâs true that itâs some peopleâs style to respond to everything anyway, even if just to say âokay!â or âthanks for letting me know,â but thatâs not everyoneâs style and itâs not rude not to reply. It sounds like you have lots of other issues with this company, and I suspect thatâs impacting how you see this. But this in and of itself isnât something to feel disrespected over, and itâs definitely not something you have standing to complain to your boss about. These questions are adapted from ones that originally appeared on Ask a Manager. Some have been edited for length.
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